Why do we believe that we are not good enough to have the life we dream of?

Low self esteem and feelings of not being good enough hold us back as humans.

This is how powerful the mind is.

It took my preschooler to make me wake up and look around at my life.

My three year old said to me “Mummy the house is very grey”
“Yes, Johnny, we painted all the walls grey”
“Mummy, I don’t like grey. I want a blue room”

More recently, and significantly, we were stuck in traffic and my three year old asked “Mummy, do we live in a city?”
“Yes, we live in a city. It has cars and buildings, see. A city”
“Mummy, I want to live in a beach please”

At three, he is wiser than me. At three he can see that we can manipulate our lives to achieve favorable outcomes and he KNOWS what he wants from his environment and his life. His world is so black and white, he doesn’t see why we can’t just go and live at the beach in a colourful, vibrant house. We could learn something from that.
Our environments are part of our well being. What does yours look like?

My daughter will surround herself with anything she finds pleasing to look at – flowers, ribbons, glitter etc. When did I stop doing this for myself? When did that part of being a female who likes pretty things become less of a priority to me? I want flowers, they make me happy, so I should damn well buy the flowers. I am always thinking of what others want, what will nourish their well being, but rarely do I treat myself in this same manner.

Imagine the life that you have always dreamed of, what does it look like? Who is in it? Who is NOT in it?

Where are you living?
Are you happy in your occupation?
Are you healthy? What are you doing to maintain good health?

Are you worried about the future? Are you always looking back into your past? What about right now. Right now is all we truly have and it is yours to build the life you dream of.

You can picture it.

Why do we get stuck in a rut? Finances? Health? Jobs?

Why can’t we just throw away multi tasking and focus on uni tasking to move forward to that which we want? In this case, it would be uni tasking towards moving to the beach. It makes the decision black and white. It means that you sit down, figure it out, and do it. Uni tasking is tunnel visions where the excuses of why you should not prioritize one thing fall away – they don’t fit in the tunnel with your vision.

Is it low self esteem holding us back? I know my Dad has always put down my achievements by saying “I never thought my daughter would be able to do that” and that comes from his low self esteem. He never believed in himself. You can have all the intellegence in the world but if you don’t believe in yourself then you wont have the confidence to take a step in the right direction. That’s why some smart people stay in their comfort zones, not progressing, and other less intelligent people lead epic lives. I know my Dad wanted a better life but he never believed he deserved it, he would roll his eyes at people who owned boats or nice cars etc. He catagorized people as “us” and “them”. This is such a common concept. We think nice lives are for other people, the people we see on instagram, not for ourselves. But screw that, you lead your own life, never mind them.

You owe it to your three year old self to know what your dream life is and be unstoppable in the pursuit to obtain it.

House on the beach illustration

 

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